Where we stand in relation to each other
by OliveBranchStories
Summary: Gwen doesn't need strength of arms or possession of magic to change the world; she doesn't need to be equal in strength to be equal to Arthur. She tells him so in front of his knights and Merlin after challenging him to an arm wrestle. One shot, not CRAC


**I have realised that the show 'Merlin' is actually quite sexist. **

**Before you recoil from your computer, thinking I'm about to preach or guy-bash to you, I'll just say hold onto your stereotypes. Isn't the show supposed to be teaching people not to make assumptions about people (sorcerers) based on ignorance? (Uther) I'm not of course, saying I am a sorcerer, that would be cool, just give this fic a shot before you shoot it down.**

**The show is quite sexist, and whenever I have sent an email the BBC won't send it on to the production team, based on the technical grounds that I am not within the responding date of the tv show. Of course I am not; I live in Australia and, therefore, am several weeks behind the rest of the world. (Even though in international dates and times Australia is actually ahead of the rest of the world…ah the joys and contradictions of being Australian.)**

**So I've decided to tackle it by myself, using fanfiction. Maybe no-one's ever changed the world with fanfiction, but I only need to make one person value equality where they used to make jokes about it for this fiction to be worth it. **

Merlin was watching the knights training without the half grin that was usually on his face broadening in time with his completely hilarious mental commentary of the men. His eyes, narrowed not in mirth but in irritation, followed the Prince's movements; swinging and ducking and blocking and basically doing movements that would require the physical prowess he had so vocally pronounced Merlin incapable of.

Arthur in a mad mood was bad, Arthur in an arrogant mood was even worse. He paraded around the castle with his head so swollen it was surpassed only by…by…the doorways…

(Thinking logically Merlin realized that if Arthur was walking around the castle his head couldn't be the biggest thing, as then it would fit through the doorways…ah, who cared about logic. Merlin wasn't going to let a little thing like the law of physics get in the way of some serious mental derision.)

Anyway, Arthur was in an arrogant mood today. Their friendly teasing over Arthur's breakfast had been not so much friendly teasing as so much a tirade of nasty remarks that were aimed at both insulting Merlin physically and making Arthur feel like he was brilliantly witty. It was the sort of behaviour that made Merlin want to grab Arthur's sword, pull it from its scabbard and shove it right up Arthur's…nose…he was going to say nose…

Merlin had, of course, defended himself, tried to show Arthur that he was being cruel and was hurting Merlin's feelings. Merlin felt it was his duty, to take Arthur in hand when he started getting too big for himself, not as Emrys shaping the future king but as a friend trying to show a friend what they were doing was wrong. It hadn't worked though…of course it hadn't worked. Arthur disregarded Merlin's advice at the best of times; the last thing he would do would be to take Merlin's advice on how to treat him. He just told him to stop "being such a girl" and to "grow a pair" and "man up." Unfortunately just as Arthur had entered the gender themed insults Gwen had been entering the room to say good morning. She had scolded Arthur for saying sexist remarks but Arthur had just swooped over to her and tried to kiss her.

Merlin remembered, not without some relish, how Gwen had deftly writhed from Arthur's grip and told him that he could only kiss her after he'd washed his mouth out. The Prince had merely laughed in an indulgent way that was so patronizing that Merlin felt a surge of anger in sympathy of Gwen that he knew was nothing compared to what she was feeling, judging by her expression. He'd reached for Gwen as he laughed; she'd jerked backwards, too gentle a soul to slap him away but too strong to lie down and take this.

"Males seem to seldom realise just how ugly sexism is," she twisted away from his look of utter bewilderment and left. She didn't storm out; she didn't undermine her words by acting like a petulant child, she just turned on her heel and left. Arthur watched her, mouth open slightly and arms still raised. He'd heard her, but Merlin didn't know if he'd place down his pride long enough to listen.

Turns out, he didn't.

"Merlin, you big girl, get that shield and bring it over here!"

Merlin sighed and turned around to find the practise shield and there was someone right behind him!

His mind said, 'It's Gwen,' his instincts (trained from too many instances of taking a blow to the back of the head) said 'DANGER! JUMP BACKWARDS! ARMS OVER HEAD DEFENSIVE MANEUVERS!'

His mind said again 'It's Gwen, you idiot, don't over-react,' but by then he was on his behind in the grass.

"Mer…" Gwen started to say but was interrupted by Merlin's sudden drop to the ground. She followed his descent, giving a distracted smile.

"Ah, Gwen, you…surprised me…"

"I noticed," she gave the same small, absent smile.

"Well I suppose you would have, I don't really fall over much when I am not surprised," Merlin stood up, brushing himself off. He paused thoughtfully.

"Actually, forget I said that, I fall over all the time when I am not…surprised…Gwen?"

For the first time Merlin had noticed that Gwen's smile wasn't really a smile. It was a fairy-tale, not a lie or the truth but a wish for how things could be accompanied by the sad knowledge of how far they are from that ideal.

It was quite a complicated smile.

"I was just thinking," she said softly, looking at Arthur. "He's doing it again."

Merlin followed her gaze; Arthur was standing with the knights gesturing wildly with his sword. It spoke volumes for the knights' trust in the prince's skill with a sword that they weren't scattering and diving for cover like Merlin would've been doing. Merlin knew by 'it' she meant the use of 'girl' as an insult.

"Aw, Gwen, you know he means nothing by it."

Gwen gazed at Merlin steadily; he knew that they both knew he was lying. Actions might speak louder than words physically, but in issues of morality words were actions. And Arthur's words were damning.

He realised all of a sudden that he'd been so distracted by the 'important' roles, Arthur the Prince, Merlin the Warlock, the Knights the Knights, that he'd failed to realise that Gwen had never been just 'the love interest,' had never been just 'the servant.' Subconsciously he had so easily labelled her as…not unimportant…but…not useful, merely because she had no sword or magic. It was only now, looking into her eyes as she looked right through him, that he realised she had something so much more valuable.

Gwen, having looked into Merlin's eyes and found him wanting, turned away, the slightest expression of dissatisfaction on her face.

"Arthur," she called across the field. Merlin picked up the shield and followed her, curious as to where events were heading.

Arthur looked around. Merlin could tell by his expression of sudden recognition that he hadn't realised Gwen had been calling him; probably because she only ever called him by his first name when they were alone together. But then maybe, like Merlin, despite years of knowing and loving her, he wasn't familiar with the voice she was speaking with or the place she was speaking from.

"Gwen?" He said with his usual baffled expression that looked like he was squinting into the sun.

"Arthur," she said again. Merlin was confused; Gwen had been more confident since Arthur and she had announced their engagement, but even for this new independence he was recognizing, she seemed to be drawing unnecessary attention. The Merlin realised what she was doing. The knights were turning towards them, she wanted to be heard. But what was she going to say?

"Would you care for an arm wrestle?"

What?

Wait…what?

He most certainly wasn't expecting that.

Arthur eloquently voiced the same initial thought as Merlin.

"What?"

"An arm wrestle."

"With…me…?"

"Yes."

"Against…you?"

"Yes Arthur," Gwen looked across at two of the knights, "Could you please get one of the benches for us?"

With mystified expressions to rival Arthurs the knights, honour and chivalry obviously overriding their bewilderment, muttered 'Yes, milady' and 'right away, milady,' and went to retrieve one of the benches usually reserved for trainees clutching their legs in agony after a round with the more seasoned knights. Of course whenever the knights looked their way the trainees would smile and wave in a nonchalant fashion…that is if nonchalant means the sort of expression that means 'please stay all the way over there and don't come near be again.'

"Gwen? What are you…?" Apparently Arthur was still sufficiently confused as to not have regained full use of his vocabulary. Gwen smiled at Arthur in a wait-and-see sort of way. Arthur looked at Merlin, Merlin shrugged, grinning. If Arthur was looking at Merlin for help he must be _really _confused.

Not that Merlin blamed him. It was every day the future queen of Camelot challenges the future king of Camelot to an arm wrestle in front of his manservant and about eight of his senior knight.

The knights carrying the seat shuffled back over.

Make that ten of his senior knights.

"There's fine," Gwen said, moving towards the knights so they didn't have to carry the bench any further. They put it down and very obviously tried not to puff. They could slay beasts and fight armies…but carry a bench. Merlin mentally whistled (actually whistling would've been a bit weird.) He sure hoped that the safety of Camelot never rested upon the knights' bench carrying skills.

Gwen then knelt by the bench and looked up expectantly at Arthur, who was still staring at her.

"Well?" She said.

"Gwen," he hissed, eyes looking to the knights and back to her, ear tips reddening.

"Arthur," she said with a sudden strength to her voice.

"I…" His eyes were still flicking to the knights, "don't embarrass me in front of the knights, Gwen."

"Are you ashamed of me Arthur?" She asked, not lowering her voice like him.

"No, it's just…you…"

"I'm a woman?" She supplied, tone innocent but with a look in her eye Merlin didn't entirely understand.

"Well, it isn't that I…it's just you…" Arthur mumbled something like 'not as strong' in a quailing way, trailing off to nothing as Gwen levelled the same look at him that Merlin had received earlier.

"It's not like you're challenging a weaker opponent," she said conversationally, raising her hand in preparation to arm wrestle even though Arthur hadn't moved. "I challenged you, after all. Surely you trust me to know what I am doing."

The knights were looking back from Gwen to Arthur. Arthur looked like he'd very much like to not be in this area anymore. Merlin didn't know if he should grin or not, so he went for looking confused.

Finally Arthur knelt down opposite Gwen. He raised one arm noisily (he was still in full armour) and put his gloved hand against Gwen's. Her wrists looked thin and her hands delicate in comparison to him; this was ridiculous it was obvious who was going to win. What was Gwen trying to do? What was she hoping to achieve?

"On the count of the three then," Gwen said cheerfully. Arthur was still looking at her with an expression showing that he half expected her to pull a mask off and reveal herself to be Gwaine.

"One…two…three."

Arthur's hand flopped beneath Gwen's to hit the wood. She scowled at him but was not surprised,

"Arthur, try."

His eyes focused somewhat, but on the second count Gwen's hand trembled for a moment against Arthur's strength before after only a moment, he let her push over his arm.

"Stop insulting me and _try,_" Gwen commanded. Arthur was now looking upset, like he didn't want to embarrass Gwen by beating her. But, Merlin thought shrewdly, losing appeared to be exactly what Gwen wanted to do.

For the third time, elbows planted on the wood, their hands met in the middle and Gwen counted,

"One…two…three."

Arthur's face did that strange thing it had a habit of doing when he focused on winning; his eyes narrowed but seemed to see more than usual. Even though he was obviously not using his full strength so as not to bruise the back of Gwen's arm against the table, Arthur won in seconds.

Gwen stood.

"The arm wrestle proves nothing."

Gwen wasn't speaking in the tone of someone who has just lost a competition and is trying to rescind the competitions importance, but as someone who is about to make a point.

"What?" Arthur said, very intelligently.

"You, and the knights, this entire kingdom, awards value to people by strength of arms. But strength of arms is not what people should be judged by. You beat me, so our society would judge that you are therefore worth more than I, are more important."

"No, Gwen I didn't mean…" Gwen held up a delicate hand firmly and stopped Arthur mid-speech.

"However," she continued, "if you fell from your horse and broke your arm, I would be able to beat you. Does this mean that suddenly I am of more value? That you are worth less?"

The men were silent, watching her. The shield was heavy in Merlin's arms and he didn't want to put it down, Arthur would call him a gir-…Merlin's brain caught up with itself and he put down the shield.

"The average man in Camelot is weaker then you, yet they are still largely treated as your equals in having a valued opinion and freedom to choose how to live their life. But when the average woman in Camelot cannot meet your strength we are seen to be weak, fragile, pretty but useless, needing protecting from ourselves. I don't deny that some women want protecting, but so do some men. Myself, I'd rather be able to defend myself then rely on somebody who may not be their when I am in need of defending."

Gwen shook her head angrily.

"If you had less strength than a murderer, does that mean that you are a worse person? That society would be wiser to pin their hopes on the killer? Of course not. Because strength isn't what matters. If you don't have a good head and heart any strength you have will be a weakness, as it only allows you to do the cruel things your pitiful sense of morality has no problem with. It's the head and the heart that matter. Of which I have proven I have plenty.

I came and challenged you to a fight which I knew I would lose, because I knew in losing it I would get the chance to say something that mattered. If you think only with your muscles you might say that I was a fool, running around flaunting my weakness, but I say that it shows character. I say it shows courage. Is courage worth less than your ability to hold a sword? Will you take away my integrity because, as a woman, you think I should have none?"

Arthur was listening with a pained expression, Merlin understood why. Merlin had always prouded himself in his way of treating others equally because he himself hated being judged by the stereotypes of servants or sorcerers. Now he was realising that wasn't true. He'd never held Gwen's opinion with the weight it deserved, merely because she was pretty and giggled and did other things it made no sense to damn her for. Light-heartedness did not mean she had none. He hadn't meant to, but he had seen her as a little shallow because she was blithely unaware of matters he had determinedly kept her ignorant of.

This self-analysis and rearranging of his values was a painful affair; Merlin was sure he had a similar expression to Arthurs. Most of the knights did too, but one or two looked on with smirks and indulgent smiles that made Merlin want to hit them. He didn't though, Gwen was speaking again, (that and if he so much as raised his hand against them they'd wipe the floor with him.)

"You call Merlin…" Merlin jumped guiltily, though he wasn't sure why, "…a girl. All the time, you say 'girl' like it is something condemnable. Like being born a girl was something people can choose and be derided for because it was a stupid decision. Like we are some sort of inferior being, and comparing a man to a women is a grave insult."

"I didn't mean…" Arthur started, but at Gwen's exasperated and sad look he stuttered into silence.

"If you didn't mean it, why did you say it? It's a joke to you, but it's putting voice to social inequality to me. When we are not treated as equals due to our gender, do you think I'll find that funny? Do you think that making a joke about it isn't going to make the matter seem trivial, not worth your time of day? Do you think that this doesn't make it _harder _for women to get equal status because most men are too busy laughing about these jokes to listen? Many men make sexist jokes and then say women have no sense of humour when they don't laugh. They say women take equality too seriously when we fight for it, as if we should judge our worth by the people who think we are worthless."

Gwen brushed herself off abruptly, straightening up to finish her speech.

"It's a joke to you, but it only reinforces the unequal standing of women in society. So if you truly think we are equals, don't say we are not. And if you do not think we are equals," Gwen's eyes flicked to the knights, "then maybe think about what your values are. Maybe think about what is truly honourable before you fight for it. Because if the justice you are fighting for says that I am not your equal just because of my gender then it isn't justice, and you are only harming Camelot by fighting for it."

Then she turned and, again without storming off, left. As they had been listening to her many of the knights had let their swords drop to the ground to rest their arms, and it was in this position that they looked to each other, taken aback, trying to see if the other knights were as taken aback as they.

Arthur was watching after Gwen with an oddly startled expression of dawning realisation. Stepping around the shield Merlin moved to his side and together they watched Gwen walk across the training field and out of sight.

"I suppose you won't be calling me a girl anymore," Merlin said, his voice slightly dazed and awed.

"No," Arthur said, pushing at Merlin whilst still watching Gwen with the new respect which had appeared in his eyes at some stage when she was speaking, "I wouldn't want to complement you, now would I?"


End file.
